A gathering of many, mainly Suffolk moments in Bertie’s life, arrived in the wood, some for the the first time like the Trustees of Dementia Carers Fund, and some regulars like Kally and Leslie and the Elders, Esther, Andrew and Wil. Pippa and Bertie’s entire family had flown from East and West, north and south to be here. The wood had been prepared: Pippa decorated the area with lanterns, Goz and I had cleared up the old ash branches across the way leading to the field (a remnant of the winter work and long overdue – nothing better than an event to de-procrastinate).
Original invitation and photos of Bertie in the woods here.
Into a circle we arranged ourselves and passed the talking stick to assemble in our basket of memories of Bertie. Oh yes there were giggles and echoes and repeats and tears and deep feelings as we recalled moments: Bertie’s gravitation towards the scones, his kindness and love of children and animals, ‘You are my dancing girl’, the Purley King under the bender, and the deep regret for many of us not knowing the Bertie others described, the sharp intellect, the knowing of history and politics, the advisor, the husband, father, brother, son.
After that good work we ate delicious food: a huge round of Barron Bigod, home made sausage rolls, sandwiches, spicy chai and the rest.
We danced to Bertie’s favourite tunes.
Come dusk we meandered over to the field where, overlooking the Blyth Valley, Simon let off an enormous rocket, containing some ashes of our beloved Bertie. What a send off. Thanks to Gill for the photos (as I was chasing a runaway dog, Brow!). I heard from the distance, ‘For he’s a jolly good fellow’, and indeed he was, and is, for he and what he created lives on.
Cathedral
Because it’s like being amongst friends
Because I feel more in tune with myself
Because the woods reminds us we are part of something bigger
They are a sanctuary for solitude and can bring us together
Because this could be a Cathedral.Because I like walking and listening
Because the trees have known a long life
And I saw a Hazel bud flower for the first time yesterday
Because we stand like a tree and look up at the canopy
Because this is my Cathedral.Because the woods give us an escape from the world
Because I love the giants of trees and the oxygen they give us
Because of the warmth of the people and the warmth of the fire
Because this is a Cathedral.Because birds are everywhere
Because I love drawing trees
Because we’ve seen the seasons change
Because I am a dog and I like a good stick
Because this is your Cathedral.Because the trees are not man made
Because the woods feel like they have always been here
Because a community has grown up with these trees
Because you can see the light through the Winter
Because my Dad, William, said it was my Cathedral, boy.
Welcome to our Cathedral.Gathered by Dean Parkin, Community Poet and Spoken by The Elders’ Tribe, in Kali Woods on 10th February 2022. From Kinda Education web.
My introduction:
Welcome to Kaliwoods (toilets/trip hazards)
Welcome in particular to Bertie’s family:
- Katie, Lisa and Ethan
Charlotte and Colin
Sama, Paul, Frank and Charlie
Simon, Michael Pat and Alex
Pippa
I only knew Bertie after his memory had faded. He came to these woods with Pippa. Most memorable for me were two moments: The moment Dean the Poet came and seeking words from us about the woods, he found a diamond in Bertie and named the poem after the line: it’s my Cathedral boy. And the other is the celebration of the Hazel Bender, when Bertie wore the coat of the Pearly King (made by all the Elders). But the thing is, Bertie has not gone. Not only is he here with us today alive in our memories, not only through his genetics being passed on generation to generation, but through him our connections. Through Bertie and his dementia, I met Pippa, who I consider a close and valuable friend. Through Kevin linking us together, Pippa and I created the Hopes and Dreams project, which lives on. And Pippa now works with the Dementia Carers Fund, an amazingly valuable service in our town.
I will pass the passing stick and ask you all to share your moments with Bertie but do not feel obliged, just pass it on, and you can write on a card instead if you so wish and pin it to add to the photographs up here.
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Kaliwood 